18 October, 2005

Name That "Toy"

Miracle of miracles, our digital camera decided to start working again, for reasons I cannot discern. So I finally got a chance to take a few pictures, among them some of the so-called “loopy toy.”
Here is the item in question:

I made this because I was reading a description of something similar for sale, and said to myself, “I can make this with under $2 worth of supplies, in under half an hour.” And so I did, although it was closer to 45 minutes if you include the time it took me to go to the 99¢ store.

When I remember to buy duct tape, I’ll post illustrated instructions on how to make it, but basically, you make loops of cord (such as is used to connect speakers to a stereo) and secure them with layers of duct tape. If you’re feeling all creative, you can pad the handle created by the duct tape with some cotton fabric.

W. has dubbed it “the loopy toy.” But calling this a toy is, to me, a misnomer (a word which here means “utterly misleading name for something that makes my butt HURT!!”). It is possible, marginally, to use this in a way that doesn’t create instant, stinging, uncomfortable pain; it’s even possible to give fairly hard strokes that don’t leave welts that sting for several days afterward. But mostly, when used with any force, I feel it for days.

My challenge, should you choose to accept it: come up with another name for this. You can, if you like, make one yourself and experiment with it. I just want to call it something other than “loopy toy,” a name that makes me think of pool noodles and Saturday morning cartoons and friendly, fuzzy things. Which this is not.


cuddlybum said...

Plagiarising from that horrible butt plug my darling is having fun with lately, you could call it the 'evil, horrible grey thing'. Runs off the tongue quite nicely - and sums up the pain, stinginess, and general ickiness!!!!

And now I'm off to do my cleaning before my darling reads this and gets some ideas - what on earth possessed you to post the instructions on how to make the blasted thing?????

Myckie Jo said...

In a past life I made something similar to this out of a lamp cord and called it the "Electric Lady", a reference to it's past life and the effect that it had.

"If you don't behave, then it's the Electric Lady for you."